Cancer

The insidiousness of the word alone strikes fear and horror into any person's heart.  This unexplainable fear has been a part of my life for the past 3 years; not as a victim of cancer but as a person who has been indirectly affected.  My Father was diagnosed with prostate cancer 3 years ago whilst I was overseas on holiday.  He has been stable for those 3 years, however, just this past week the cancer has been diagnosed as critical - which means that we are now faced with a battle no one wants to have.  

My baby Brother is currently undergoing chemotherapy for a lymphoma in his throat - another cancer which is not genetically linked.  No one ever expects things to happen to them or their family.  You hear of the horrors that occur daily, yet it is always someone else.  We tend to forget that that 'someone else' has a family themselves and also never foresaw the horrors that they were dealt in life.

My dad this week will be told where he needs to go for the tests that they need done.  He then will have an operation rather than the chemotherapy.  The operation however, cannot be done until 6 weeks after the biopsy.  This places it just before my niece's naming day, however dad will put off the op until just after this day.

This blow has blindsided me so much that I am as they say "up to pussy's bow".  This is not about me, yet all I can do is focus my efforts elsewhere so that the control I feel inside me splintering is not noticed by anyone and my breaking down does not put stress elsewhere.  Have you ever wondered what it would be like to go away - will it affect many people or would it just make things easier?  I hate the word cancer and all it means to everyone......