Saturday, February 14, 2009


The insidiousness of the word alone strikes fear and horror into any person's heart.  This unexplainable fear has been a part of my life for the past 3 years; not as a victim of cancer but as a person who has been indirectly affected.  My Father was diagnosed with prostate cancer 3 years ago whilst I was overseas on holiday.  He has been stable for those 3 years, however, just this past week the cancer has been diagnosed as critical - which means that we are now faced with a battle no one wants to have.  

My baby Brother is currently undergoing chemotherapy for a lymphoma in his throat - another cancer which is not genetically linked.  No one ever expects things to happen to them or their family.  You hear of the horrors that occur daily, yet it is always someone else.  We tend to forget that that 'someone else' has a family themselves and also never foresaw the horrors that they were dealt in life.

My dad this week will be told where he needs to go for the tests that they need done.  He then will have an operation rather than the chemotherapy.  The operation however, cannot be done until 6 weeks after the biopsy.  This places it just before my niece's naming day, however dad will put off the op until just after this day.

This blow has blindsided me so much that I am as they say "up to pussy's bow".  This is not about me, yet all I can do is focus my efforts elsewhere so that the control I feel inside me splintering is not noticed by anyone and my breaking down does not put stress elsewhere.  Have you ever wondered what it would be like to go away - will it affect many people or would it just make things easier?  I hate the word cancer and all it means to everyone......

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Spare A Thought...

I thought that today I would focus my post on something other than me.  Today Victoria has sweltered through its hottest day in history.  We have so many fires that are burning out of control and the horrid thing is that some asshole/s are getting a kick out of the fact that this attention is focused because they started the monstrosities that we are trying to deal with.  Houses and lives have been affected across the State.

I almost cried at a picture of some horses huddled together with flames in the background.  The helpless such as our wildlife and family members who don't have a voice but never the less give their support and love unconditionally are being killed in the destruction that is a fire.  So for all of you out there thinking of the material cost just remember that there is a greater cost...our loving four legged friends.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009


I never thought I was much of a procrastinator but yesterday I'm sure proved me wrong.  I went, with my parents, to the jeweller recommended to us, to organise the creating of a I.D. bracelet for my niece as a present for her 'Naming Day'.  Whilst there I also thought it was about time I organised something for my diamond that my parents had given me for my 30th birthday - 6 years ago!

So, there I was, um-ing and ah-ing over what I wanted to do with the diamond.  Did I want a ring? A pendant? A bracelet?  In the end after many various suggestions I decided that I'd go with a ring.  From here the procrastination really got started.  I went through at least 10 specialist jewellers magazines with designs.  It has now been decided, a quote issued and now I just need to say my bickies for the creation of the ring...thank God I have some money coming in at the moment and that they won't begin the ring until April!!

I keep saying, and you'll note from previous posts, that I am considered 'High Maintenance'.  I sometimes wonder if this is really just a signification of the fact that I have excellent taste...Yep, I will definitely go with that line of thought!

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Chapter 3

Josh walked out of the cockpit after ensuring all was secured.  Eve had come back into the cockpit after he’d taken off to let him know that Jasmine was asleep.  He told her just to let her sleep but keep an eye on her in case she needed anything.  He’d received an unladylike snort at that.  His sister had very strong ideas on peoples places in the world and she had chewed him out for his apparent rudeness to their passenger, now the head of the corporation and maybe if the feelings were true, his mate.  As Alpha of the pack his sister should have shown him the respect due to his station, but obviously her ideology on people’s station and how they were to be treated did not include him.   He’d just ignored her and told her to buckle up for take off.  He couldn’t very well have told her that if he’d spent any more time in their guest’s company he’d possibly have jumped her bones, ensuring her position as Alpha Female to pack, regardless of her already high station by being the previous Alpha pair’s daughter.

Jasmine Chevalier had a very big shock coming her way, and just in time for her awakening ceremony.  Josh ran a hand down his face, inwardly fighting the anger and exhaustion that had been riding him for the past 12 months since he’d stepped into the position of Pack Leader and Alpha One.  The traitor was still at large and they’d lost two other pairs since the murders of Jonathon and Marissa Chevalier.  One pair his own parents the Beta pair to the pack.  The other, his own Beta’s parents.  Whoever the murderer was, they’d known the structure of the pack and the most influential members to strike at.  He’d been to see Jasmine directly after her parents’ funerals and had to deal with her annoying aunt.  She smelled just like he remembered when he’d climbed into her room and made sure she was okay.  He crouched in front of her and inhaled deeply.

God, she smelled wonderful.  It had nearly undone him at the Melbourne airport when he’d gone to collect her and had smelled her arousal.  Those eyes watching him had been the only thing that had stopped him marking her then and there.  They’d held passion but beneath it was confusion, sorrow and fear.

He reached out a hand to brush back some hair that had fallen over her eyes and she nuzzled her face into the open hand, sighing in her sleep.  Josh stayed that way for a couple of seconds, until he heard someone clearing their throat behind him.

“Ah, I just thought I’d see how things had gone.”  Standing up, away from Jasmine, he stood, saw his Beta and best friend Lucas at the door.

“It went okay.  She has no idea Luc.  How am I supposed to tell her she’s not who she thought she was and neither were her parents?”

“I don’t know man, and I don’t want to be in your shoes if she’s anything like Marissa was.  If she’s her mother’s daughter, then you will have a stubborn female alpha on your hands.”

“No shit Sherlock.  Eve’s been giving me the fifth degree for my supposed treatment of her and Jasmine doesn’t even know that the rest of the female pack members will follow whatever her wishes are.”

“Look at it this way buddy, at least she’s pretty.”  Luc was grinning at him.

“Don’t you start that shit, ‘buddy’, or I’ll tell Eve that you’ve got the hots for her.”  Josh grinned as Luc’s face blanched.  His Beta may be the second strongest male in the pack with the power to aid his Pack Leader, but when it came to Josh’s little sister the guy was a puppy.

“Alright! Jeez, no need to play dirty.  Anyway, do you need a hand getting Sleeping Beauty out to the house and settled?”

“I’ll carry her if you can get her bags.  I think this is the first time in a while since she’s slept properly; and the change is not far away either.  Something else for us to deal with.”  Josh turned back to the still sleeping Jasmine, gently removed her loose clasp on the backpack and handed it to Lucas who grabbed it and the only other bag she’d brought with her.  He eased an arm under her thighs and the other behind her back, lifting her slowly so as not to disturb her rest.  Once he was standing again she shifted slightly, curling a hand against his neck and sighing as she settled deeper into her exhausted slumber.


Jasmine wished that the bird outside her window would shut up. Hold on, what bird?  She slowly opened her eyes and saw a blue/grey velvet roof above her.  Rising up upon her elbows she looked around a magnificent room.  It looked like something that had been crossed between antique French and English.  The velvet above her head was attached to a canopy four post bed.  There were lush carpets in gold and cherry wooden balloon chairs to match the wood of the bed.  To her left she saw French doors that opened onto a balcony, and there was the bird that had insisted she awaken.

As she focused upon the annoying bird, the door at the end of the room opened and the flight attendant entered.  What was her name again?  Eve, that’s it.

“Oh, miss, you’re awake.  I thought you might be hungry about now since you slept yesterday away.”  She grinned and brought over a tray.

“Unh,” good one Jazz, very articulate.  She scramble to sit up better against the bed head as Eve brought the tray to her lap. “Ah, thank you, Eve and please I’m Jasmine, not miss.”

“Okay.  I’m glad to see you awake.  Josh is downstairs with the Administrator when you’re ready.  But I told him he’d have to wait until you’d had your breakfast and shower.”  Eve plopped herself on the edge of Jazz’s bed and made herself comfy.  She chatted non-stop as Jazz ate her breakfast in awe of the girl and how she didn’t seem to breathe as she let Jazz know the ins and outs of the household.  From the gardener chasing some young boy through a fountain because of plants being planted into a love heart (the boy was lovesick over some girl); to the cook who continually moaned that everyone was always hungry, then getting upset if people were too busy to eat what she made. 

As Jasmine finished her cup of tea, Eve grabbed the tray and still talking walked back towards the door.  “Just come down once you’ve had your shower Jasmine.  Don’t worry I’ll let Josh know you’ll be along soon.”  With that she was gone.

Jasmine got out of bed and realised she was just in her panties, bra and t-shirt from the previous day.  Not wanting to think further on how she had become partially disrobed, she pulled a fresh pair of jeans, tank top, and cardigan from her the wardrobe, where her clothes seemed to have been placed.  She stood for a minute looking at her lingerie deciding that she needed the armour to once more deal with the boorish Joshua McAllister after the previous day’s dismissal.  So, chose the latest in Victoria Secrets silk series, a g-string and demi bra in butter soft yellow.

Jasmine didn’t know how long she stood under the pounding spray, but after washing her hair thoroughly, she emerged refreshed with her brain beginning to kick into gear.  Downstairs was the answers to all that had happened twelve months ago in the form of the unknown Administrator.  Quickly towelling off then massaging her favourite body lotion in she dressed and made her way out the door Eve had entered some 45 minutes earlier.  She made her way down the hall towards a long staircase that would take her to Joshua McAllister and the mysterious Administrator.



“She has no idea what is happening Marcus.” Josh stood facing a window talking to one of his best friends who had taken over the role of the Pack Administrator from his father when he had died two years ago.  “When I snuck into her room a year ago after the joint funeral of the Pack Alphas I couldn’t believe that she was the one, my mate.  Remember, I told you that this would be more difficult than we expected?  Now she’s here, not only about to undergo the change but has to deal with becoming my mate and that we have a traitor in our midst; not even mentioning the deaths of her parents.”

Mate? Change? What the hell was this guy talking about?

“Well, doofus, what did you expect – she’d just jump into your arms screaming her undying love?  As if there wasn’t going to be some payback for the ease you’ve had with the women all these years and this was never going to be easy with the deaths of Jonathon and his mate.”

“Yeah laugh it up. Just you – “ Josh turned around at the sound of a muffled laugh and there stood Jasmine.

“Ah, hello, you must be Jasmine.  My pleasure to meet you; I’m Marcus, the gorgeous one also known as the Administrator.”  Marcus walked forward to the woman standing in the doorway.  He could understand why his friend was so smitten with her she was absolutely stunning.  If it wasn’t for the fact he was determined not to become mated then he might have given Josh a run for his money.  Still he could have some fun with this, teasing his friend who had become far too serious in the past few years with the deaths of Jasmine’s parents.

“Uh, hi.  Sorry I didn’t mean to interrupt anything, it’s just that Eve said to come down after my shower.”  Jasmine looked between the two men.  God, what perfect specimens of males they were.  Both of them had the faces of fallen angels; dangerous, hard and so masculine she could feel here clean panties getting wet again.

“Jasmine, please take a seat.” Josh indicated the sofa and wing back chairs.  She moved into the room and made her way to the sofa.  As Josh sat on the other end of the sofa, Jazz felt her pussy spasm and more cream flooded her panties.  Was it just her or did it suddenly feel hot in the sunlit room.  Marcus shut the door and then sat on a seat opposite the sofa.

“Okay, now that I’m here can one of you please tell me what the hell is going on?”  She was not in the mood for any more mysteries.  Her parents had been murdered, she’d left everything behind on an ominous letter left by her father, she kept having erotic thoughts which were making her cranky, not to mention whatever these two had been discussing as she was about to enter the room.

She saw Josh give a look at Marcus, as if to say see, I told you.  Jazz was having none of that.  Mr. MacAllister.  I believe that I have been more than patient.”  He sighed and rubbed at a tiny scar she could see along his nose.

“Jasmine,” Marcus interrupted.  Gone was the boyish look of before, “this is a discussion none of us expected to have with you.  When we thought of meeting you it was that our world would be fully known to you; that your parents would have taught you what you needed to become part of us, but the events a year ago changed everything.  Much more than just your involvement was affected with their deaths.”  He paused and looked sorrowfully at his clasped hands. 

Jazz could feel the tenseness that was affecting Marcus also settle across herself and Josh.  Whatever it was they were about to tell her she knew was going to be bad.  God, had her parents not been the heads of a corporation but a mafia cell.  She took a fortifying breath and looked between the two men, not sure she wanted to stay in the room.  “Okay, enough of the doom and gloom.  Just spit it out.  At the moment my imagination is going wild at what could be so bad that you need to put me out of misery.”

Josh sighed and turned to face her, a flash of, could that be fear, in his eyes then “We’re werewolves and your parents were Pack Alphas, that is the leaders of our Pack.”  He was watching her now.

“Wait a minute doofus, I’ve been through enough already, beginning with the deaths of my parents that you can stow the bullshit and tell me the truth.”  Jasmine stood up and glared at the two men, both who seemed to be watching her very carefully. 

“See, I told you there was no way this was going to be easy Marcus.”  Josh stood up and once again went to stare out the windows.

“Jasmine, please, this isn’t a joke.  I know that this seems cruel, but it’s true.  We really are werewolves and your parents were our leaders.”

“Yeah, well fuzzbutt, if my parents were werewolves, then how come I never saw them change?  I mean I lived with them for Christ’s sake.  And if they really were what you say they were, then how come I haven’t gone all fuzzy?  Well?”

“Your mother wasn’t born wolf.”

“What was that Mr. MacAllister?”

Josh turned around, “I said that the reason you haven’t changed yet is because your mother wasn’t born a werewolf – you were and your father was, but because your mother wasn’t your change won’t occur until the full moon after your 25th birthday.  In fact, the full moon is due in 9 days.”

Putting her hands on her hips, she glared at Josh.  “Well, smart ass, how do you know that I’ll change?”

“We can smell it, and your mother was a true candidate for the change as she was psychic.  People can only be turned if they have some element of magic in them, or what the human society call psychic.”

“Hold on one freakin’ moment.  Smell?  Are you saying that even with my shower I smell?”

“Jasmine, it’s not that kind of smell.  You’re trying to misconstrue Josh.  He means that with a first change, particularly an Alpha female like you, you tend to go into heat.”

“EEW!  You two are just wrong, do you realise that?  Are you both sure that there wasn’t any magic mushrooms in my omelette?  First you believe that you’re werewolves, then that my parents were the leaders of your psychosis, and finally that the reason I haven’t ‘changed’, is because my mother was a psychic first!  Delusional, that’s what you both are.”

“Jasmine, we really are werewolves.”  Marcus looked at her then at Josh as if looking for backup.  “Josh, we’re going to have to show her. It would be better if you show her.”

“Fine.”  Josh took his t-shirt off and dropped his hands to his button fly.

“Whoa, back up there Scooby.”

“Jasmine, he has to take his clothes off to show you.  Relax, it will be okay, I promise.”